I learned something today. I thought it was a big enough realization to share. Just because a person is at a high level in the parelli program with their horse, doesn't necessarily mean they haven't missed the important points. I guess you can go through the motions, and with the right horse, you could force them to perform and do the things that are seen as amazing to others. But it doesn't necessarily mean you understand your partner, or that you've learned the emotional fitness needed. Or that you have the bond-which to me, is the entire POINT of parelli-to achieve a bond that's more powerful than you've ever felt. The finesse and cool things you can do-thats really just the icing on the cake.
What brought this on? Tonight when I was doing chores, a boarder brought her horse into the arena, and began 'playing'. This boarder had just sent in her level 3 liberty assessment a few weeks ago, mind you. Maybe she was just having a bad day-but still, this has happened repeatedly with her and this horse, where she's acted similarly. Anyways, when I started, she was already playing with her horse. She was trying to send it over a 3 foot jumping squeeze game-small barrels set up alongside the railing of the arena, where I was working. This horse is between her middle ages and her elderly stages-and hadn't been worked with regularly in the five months I've been where I am. I was surprised when she didn't go through her phases properly-instead her phases were rapid, lacking subtledty, with a lot of energy behind them. When the mare stopped at the jump instead of going over it, she was met with a smack of the carrot stick.
The mare, tense, rushed the jump the next time she was told to go. She knocked down the barrels-repeatedly. At first, the owner just glared and set the jump back up. When the horse danced sideways tensely when the owner told her to go, she was met with a growling "Quit it" a glare, and then a smack, to which the mare finally went over. She was sent over the jump several more times-each time she knocked over the barrels. The owner was getting progressively frustrated, and the horse more frustrated. The owner took the horse aside a couple of times and was further smacked-given a glare and a mere split second to move before she was smacked with a harshness that shocked me. The line was taken off, and they went at liberty. I don't exactly know what went wrong-I was focusing on my work-but when I looked up again the owner had the horse by the halter, jerking it and positively snarling 'quit it'. I went back to work, looked up and the horse had bolted from the owner, back to her place of safety no doubt-her stall. The owner stomped out of sight to her horse. When she came back with her horse online, I was moving the chairs and whatnot, so the owner had to play with her horse elsewhere in the arena. Next time I looked up, the owner was absolutely vivid, and playing yoyo. The horse took one crooked step and her hindquarters were met with a whack. The mare did her yoyo straight after that, and I focused on my work again. Finished up the side I was working on, and the owner went back to the barrels. Again and again the horse knocked the barrels down. The owner began punishing the horse every time the barrels came down. Then she tried to disengage the hindquarters to find that her horse didn't want to look at her, and got even angrier at that. At this point, my brain started working again, and I started thinking all the things I could have said-Its not about jumping the barrels perfectly! Your horse is afraid! You're sacrificing the relationship! She's already trying HARD for you! Take a break!-ect. But..I knew the anger would only be directed at me then, and it wouldn't help anything. Farrah was watching, and as soon as she made her presence known, the owner calmed down a bit. Farrah simply asked if the horse had jumped the barrels before, to which the owner replied 'lots of times', and then farrah confirmed that the owner had a lesson coming up. When Farrah left, the owner went straight back to what she was doing before. At this point, I tuned it out and finished working.
Anyways-so maybe the owner was having a bad day, or whatnot. But this scene really stuck in my head, and i came to the conclusion that this is what happens when you put the goal in front of the relationship. And its not worth it. Also, that angry mindset is the result of blaming the horse and being direct lined instead of thinking laterally. ...alright, gotta go. Just wanted to write that down because I figure when I have my next frustrating day with some horse or another, I'll review this to remind myself.
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